Anniversaries and Such


Today Debbie and I have been married 28 years.

I’ve now been married for half my life. No question, the married half has been better than the single half.

I remember standing up there at the front of church, waiting for Debbie to make the trip down the aisle. I didn’t think it would be a big deal. I was wrong. My knees were shaking. It may have been the most nervous I’ve been in my life… either half.

I also remember those words, “For Better or for worse.” And that’s how it’s been.

Mostly it’s been for better.

But there have been the “for worse” times too. Richard’s death tops that list by a wide margin. I think having one another is how we’ve made it through this so far.

This is also another anniversary of sorts. On this day two years ago, we had the last truly, completely happy day of our lives. The next day we found out Richard was dead.

That’s how it is now, I mark time by “before Richard died” and “after Richard died.”

And I hate that.

This day is one of the best of my life. Conning Debbie into marrying me was the best thing I’ve ever done. She’s been a blessing every day since.

So I don’t want this day associated with pain. This is a day I’ll always be grateful for and I’m going to keep that way.

And for all you single parents that are dealing with child loss, all I can say is, “Wow, I’m so sorry.” That has to be so very tough to do. I can’t imagine not having Debbie to face this with. Having someone to lean on helps, but it still takes my breath away at times. Having to go this path on my own, alone, would just be unbearable.

There’s been a lot in the news lately about high profile guys screwing up their marriage.  Very sad.

Author Michael Hyatt has a blog post about protecting your marriage. It’s a good idea. You never know when your marriage may become your only ancor in a world gone out of control. He also explains how to become your spouse’s best friend.


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