Comforting Thoughts

Purple Martin Air Force

Thumbnail image for Purple Martin Air Force June 25, 2011

Squadron Leader: “Attack Group 1 – “Red alert! I repeat, red alert! Form up on my tail, we’re making a frontal assault” Purple Wing One: “Roger Squadron Leader. Purple Wing One forming on the right.” Purple Wing Two: “Purple Wing Two forming on your left wing, over.” Squadron Leader: “Attack Group 2 – form up on […]

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Final Four

Thumbnail image for Final Four April 25, 2011

The NCAA men’s basketball tournament will always bring back memories of Richard. The early rounds are played all over the country. There are a lot of games. The last games of each round get late starts, so it’s not unusual for one or two to still be in action when I get home from work after […]

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Church On TV and A Marathon

Thumbnail image for Church On TV and A Marathon March 1, 2011

It was the Sunday before the SuperBowl. This was a Sunday with no football. Yeah, there was the Pro Bowl but come on, really, that’s not football. I didn’t want to watch that. What to do? The USA Network came to the rescue. They ran a 12 hour NCIS marathon. Starting with the very first […]

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Let’s Just Get To The Bottom Of This Hill

Thumbnail image for Let’s Just Get To The Bottom Of This Hill January 4, 2011

I read many blogs that deal with Internet Marketing.  I find the subject interesting. One of my favorites is a blog called Psychotactics by Sean D’Sousa. In his latest newsletter Sean wasn’t talking to grieving parents, but he could have been. Imagine thirty thousand menacing obstacles in your path to success. You’re dehydrated. Hungry as […]

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Watching Football

Thumbnail image for Watching Football November 16, 2010

Football season was always one of my favorite times with Richard – at least during his more adult years. While he lived in Lexington he came to most of our pre-game tailgate parties at Commonwealth stadium, when we went to UK games. He didn’t miss much free food. He also liked to come and “discuss” the game. […]

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Richard Returns

August 4, 2010

It’s been over 14 months since Richard’s death. Last night was the second time I’ve seen him in a dream. This still surprises me. Seems like I’d dream about him all the time. But I don’t. This time he was only there for a few seconds. I don’t remember the exact details, but it seems […]

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Testing One, Two, Three…

Thumbnail image for Testing One, Two, Three… July 27, 2010

It’s been there for over a year now. Sitting right on my computer desk. One of the things I brought home from Richard’s apartment was that microcassette recorder pictured above. There were several cassettes, all looking new and unused. I finally popped them into the recorder and hit play. They were mostly blank. But on […]

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Travel

Thumbnail image for Travel July 19, 2010

We went on a short vacation last week.  I‘m not a big fan of traveling, but I think it helped. Staying busy is a good thing. It helps you stay out of that dark hole grieving parents can sink into so quickly. But it seems to help more if it’s something out of the ordinary. […]

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Spring In The Cemetery

Thumbnail image for Spring In The Cemetery April 23, 2010

Though it often hasn’t felt possible after Richard’s death, life does indeed go on. Spring is when nature shows us there is hope. There is new life. I took my camera to the cemetery this morning. Even in a place that is the focus of our pain there is also much beauty. Hope you enjoy […]

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To An Unconquerable Soul

Thumbnail image for To An Unconquerable Soul April 9, 2010

Invictus – William Ernest Henley Out of the night that covers me,
 Black as the pit from pole to pole, 
I thank whatever gods may be
 For my unconquerable soul. In the fell clutch of circumstance 
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
 Under the bludgeonings of chance
 My head is bloody, but unbowed. Beyond […]

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St. Patrick

Thumbnail image for St. Patrick March 17, 2010

Today is St. Patrick’s Day. Pictured above is my uniform for the day. They were Richard’s clothes. One of the sacraments in the Catholic church is Confirmation. When we were babies our parents chose to have us baptized into the Catholic church. When we get older, usually middle school aged, we confirm that we choose […]

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Onions

Thumbnail image for Onions March 8, 2010

One of the best things for spiritual healing is to get outside. Into the sunshine – into the light. Winter makes this hard to do. But spring is finally offering it’s first teasing tastes of better days ahead. This weekend brought us temps in the low 50’s and sunshine. I went out to my garden […]

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Lighting Candles at Church

Thumbnail image for Lighting Candles at Church February 28, 2010

The Compassionate Friends have an annual candle lighting ceremony and lighting candles is an important ritual in the Catholic Church. I light candles for Richard at least once a week. So why do we light candles? In lighting candles we see our prayer rising up to heaven. We join our prayer in solidarity with others […]

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Faith

Thumbnail image for Faith February 11, 2010

Faith seems to play a big part in dealing with our grief. It even played a part in causing our grief. Faith in the medical profession was a big factor in Richard’s death. I’m sure the generic seizure medicine caused him to have his last seizure. We believed what they all told us – that […]

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The Grief Roller Coaster

Thumbnail image for The Grief Roller Coaster January 19, 2010

Life after lossing a child has been a big roller coaster ride. There have been a lot of deep plunges into the unknown. And then there have been times the track has leveled out, maybe even climbed a small hill or two. But the ride continues and the path ahead is uncertain. Right now the […]

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A Nice Call

Thumbnail image for A Nice Call December 27, 2009

Got a call from Dusty Rhodes today. Dusty is Chapter Leader of The Compassionate Friends of Frankfort, KY and the regional coordinator. Debbie has been to a few meetings there and we both went to the last meeting before Christmas. Dusty called to just let us know he was thinking about us. This is our […]

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The Story Behind “Precious Child”

Thumbnail image for The Story Behind “Precious Child” December 21, 2009

While searching for information about the Worldwide Candle Lighting I stumbled upon the song “Precious Child.” Or maybe I should say I was grabbed by the song. It really had a strong affect on me. Because this song had such a strong affect on me, I went searching for the artist. “Precious Child was written […]

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Christmas Memories

Thumbnail image for Christmas Memories December 18, 2009

Of our three children, Richard probably looked most forward to Christmas. He was four months old on his first Christmas. After we put the tree up we brought Richard into the room and put him on the floor in front of the tree. He lit up just like that tree. He just squealed and laughed. […]

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Our First Candle Lighting Ceremony

Thumbnail image for Our First Candle Lighting Ceremony December 13, 2009

Tonight we went to the Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting at Frankfort, KY. This is a memorial service for the parents, family and friends of our lost children. We honor the memory of our child with music, poems, a slide show and a candle lighting service. This event happens in each time zone all over […]

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Precious Child by Karen Taylor-Good

Thumbnail image for Precious Child by Karen Taylor-Good December 13, 2009

We will be attending the Worldwide Candle Lighting tomorrow.  On the web page about this event there is a video. It features the song Precious Child by Karen Taylor-Good. The song grabbed me. It’s beautiful and amazing. I found a video on YouTube that just has the song – no info about the Candle Lighting. […]

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Compassionate Friends

Thumbnail image for Compassionate Friends December 5, 2009

Grief Support After the Death of a Child “The Compassionate Friends is about transforming the pain of grief into the elixir of hope. It takes people out of the isolation society imposes on the bereaved and lets them express their grief naturally. With the shedding of tears, healing comes. And the newly bereaved get to […]

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Richard’s Fruit Salad

Thumbnail image for Richard’s Fruit Salad December 4, 2009

The holiday season has arrived. And for us that means family gatherings. My siblings, our children and our dogs meet at “The Farm” – my dad’s place. The Farm is 153 acres of rolling hills surrounded by creaks. There are ponds for fishing and plenty of woods to explore. The kind of place you can […]

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Thanksgiving – Our First Big Holiday

Thumbnail image for Thanksgiving – Our First Big Holiday November 26, 2009

It’s Thanksgiving Day here in the USA. Time to give thanks to our maker for all the good things he has given us. It has also been six months since Richard died. So you probably think we won’t find anything to be thankful for. After all it’s hard to be thankful for grief, pain and […]

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Strange Dream

Thumbnail image for Strange Dream November 16, 2009

I haven’t had a dream since Richard died. At least not one I remembered. Until last night. In my dream I was checking out Facebook. And Facebook said, “Richard Mudd commented on…” A couple of times. Don’t remember whose Facebook posts he commented on. Not sure I even recognized the names.  Seeing Richard making comments […]

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Can You Dream Again?

Thumbnail image for Can You Dream Again? November 15, 2009

After Richard’s death Paula Fangman from our church gave us a copy of Healing After Loss – Daily Meditations for Working Through Grief by Martha Whitmore Hickman. Paula found this book helpful after her husband passed away. It contains some inspiring quotes and a short reading for each day of the year. The entry for […]

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Happiness by the Books

Thumbnail image for Happiness by the Books November 9, 2009

As grieving parents we tend to notice – even concentrate – on one thing ; our grief. That’s something we can’t avoid for a long time after our child has passed away. It just keeps jumping up and smacking us in the face. But at some point we all need to find a way out […]

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The Smile Challenge

Thumbnail image for The Smile Challenge November 8, 2009

Richard was a Dr. Seuss fan. He had all his children’s books. And he demanded they be protected from visiting small children. So I thought this image and the up lifting  message it presents would be a good choice for grieving parents. It’s a tough goal. Sometime we can make it, sometime we can’t get […]

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Getting Away From It All

Thumbnail image for Getting Away From It All November 5, 2009

Debbie had to go to a conference for her job this past week. It was at Lake Barkley State Resort Park. We decided to turn it into a get away from it all mini-vacation. So I took several days off from work and tagged along. It was a pretty low key conference, with plenty of […]

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Our First Halloween at the Cemetery

Thumbnail image for Our First Halloween at the Cemetery October 31, 2009

Richard was a big fan of Halloween. So we had to do a little decorating around his tombstone. One tradition at our church has been a Halloween party for the kids. As part of this celebration there was often a haunted house – if there were enough older kids to run it. When Richard was […]

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Butterflies

Thumbnail image for Butterflies October 4, 2009

It is fall. A nice time to be outside. Debbie was in the backyard cooking our supper on the grill. Grilling may be the husband’s job in most households but we like the food to be edible when it’s done, so Debbie usually handles this chore. I was riding around on my lawnmower. Debbie motioned […]

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Gifts at the Grave

Thumbnail image for Gifts at the Grave September 26, 2009

I visited Richard’s grave the other day and found a new addition – pictured above. Richard had many good friends. His passing affected them as well as it did us. They miss him too. They visit his grave. We’ve been there a few times when they’ve arrived. Other times they’ve left clues. Like these soft […]

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The Richard Book

Thumbnail image for The Richard Book September 26, 2009

Debbie’s birthday was last month. Her gift from our daughter Sarah arrived from Texas the other day. In the enclosed birthday card, Sarah instructed her mom to share the gift with me. There was a pack of Kleenex attached to the gift, warning of an emotional surprise inside. It was a special gift indeed. Inside […]

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